Category Archives: Host Family Tips

Focus on Play: New Ideas for Some Classic Toys

It is good to offer kids a balance of independent play time and play where you are actively engaging with them. You can make toys they may be bored with, feel new and exciting, by suggesting different ways to play with them. Try some of the ideas below as a starting point.

Play Food/Dishes

  • Teach your host children how to say the names of some of the food and dishes in your language.
  • Using English and/or your language play games where you are ordering food like in a restaurant. Take turns with who will be the waiter and who is the customer.
  • Come up with silly food combinations.  For example: Who wants pickles on their slice of cake?
  • Play a guessing game where the children have to figure out what food you are talking about.  For example: I grow under the ground in the dirt.  People eat me fried, mashed and baked.  What am I? (a potato)
  • Play a game with setting the table using your language to ask for the different items (plate, spoon, etc.)
  • Ask the children to divide the foods up into the different food groups (vegetables, meat, dairy, etc.)

Lego Blocks and Other Building Toys

  • Divide up all of the blocks between the people playing, by taking turns for each person to select block by block.
  • Suggest specific things to build (robots, houses, mountains etc.) and build together.
  • Challenge everyone to use all of their blocks.
  • Sort the blocks by color or shape and make patterns with them (red, blue, red, blue or square, triangle, rectangle.)  You can create a pattern and ask the child to fill in what comes next to continue the pattern.
  • Make the tallest block tower you can and let them knock it down (over and over again, if like most kids, they like destroying things.)

Mr. Potato Head

  • Teach your host children the names of the different parts in your language and play a game asking them to put on the body parts by name.
  • Play Hide and Seek with Mr. Potato Head. Have the children cover their eyes and count, while you hide Mr. Potato Head, then they go looking for him. Switch things up by letting them hide Mr. Potato Head and then you are the one to locate him.
  • Play the same game above, but using Simon Says.  Simon Says is a game where the leader gives commands by saying “Simon says” first. For example, “Simon says, put on the nose.”  The players are only to follow the commands when the leader says “Simon says.”  If the leader doesn’t say “Simon says” first and just says, “put on the nose,”  and the player follows the command, they are out of the game.  Repeat the game multiple times, so all kids get a turn to be the leader at least once.

Photos:  Lisa Maxwell (top) & Tom Smalls (bottom)

Winter Driving Tips

driving-in-snowIf the snow &/or ice is heavy or threatening to become heavy, don’t go out. It is not worth the risk. Cancel, change plans, make due. If you must go out, keep the trip as short as possible, and follow these guidelines.
When there is snow &/or ice on the street:
1. If your car has been outside, warm up the car and clean the snow & ice off all windows & windshields using a brush & scraper (make sure your headlights and brake lights are snow free). Do not warm up a car in a closed garage.
2. Go more slowly than usual, and leave more time than you normally would to get where you’re going.
3. Keep a safe distance between you and the vehicle(s) ahead of you. Safe distance in snow is double the normal distance.
4. Turn your headlights on if it is snowing (and any time you use your windshield wipers). In heavy snow, fog lights might also be helpful (but not all cars have them).
5. Don’t make sudden or jerky movements with steering, and don’t accelerate or brake forcefully. This can cause you to slide and lose control.
6. If you start to slide or skid, take your foot off the gas pedal and keep steering & looking where you want to go. When you are headed the right way again and feel some traction, accelerate slowly (or brake slowly). If your wheels start to spin, take your foot off the gas pedal until you feel the tires grab again.
7. When you break, push the break gently. If you have anti-lock brakes, you will hear a thumping sound which is normal (it is the way the car prevents the brakes from locking up and making the situation worse). If you have regular brakes, pump them slowly, keeping your heel on the floor and the ball of your foot on the brake pedal (this helps you to be gentler because you are using only your foot, not your whole leg).
8. If you need to get out of a parking space with a lot of snow, you might need to “rock” the car, going forward a little, then back a little, over and over. Keep the wheels fairly straight, with only slight movements left or right. It is really difficult to get over snow when the wheels are turned hard to the left or right. If that doesn’t work, you may need to either shovel the snow out of the way or put down sand, kitty litter or gravel to get traction (some families keep a bag of this in the trunk).
9. Keep your gas tank at least ¼ full so that the gas line doesn’t freeze (if extra moisture gets in the line), and keep your windshield wiper fluid 1/2 full or more. You don’t want to run out of wiper fluid in the middle of the road with trucks spewing dirty slush onto your windshield.
10. Never use the cruise control in snow, ice or rain. It can cause the car to hydroplane and you could lose control.

Avoiding Homesickness this Holiday Season

Homesickness can be a problem during the holidays, even if it hasn’t been at any other time of the year. Au pairs often miss their friends and family, familiar places and their own traditions and customs. The holiday activities in the United States seem, and may actually be, different just at a time when an au pair would welcome something familiar. 

It is common for au pairs’ emotions to be close to the surface during the holidays. Her highs are higher, her lows are lower. The enormity of what she has done–actually living in another country (which is an amazing thing when you think about it!)–hits her and throws her into a self-protective mode.

Host parents can help her through this unfamiliar territory by talking to her about what your specific family activities will be (gifts, meals, visitors, religious services, in-home traditions, or none of these, as the case may be.) In the spirit of cultural exchange, ask her if she has any favorite holiday traditions or foods that you might be able to incorporate into your family’s celebration of the season. Let her know what you will be doing, when you will be doing it, and what she can expect. Talk to her about what has to be accomplished and get her involved and interested. Don’t expect her to just “know” what needs to be done. Give her some clear, agreed upon assignments. Make her feel a part of things. And, let her know her contribution is needed and appreciated.

Photo: Sheila Sund (Flickr)

Thanksgiving Tips for Au Pairs & Host Parents

Thanksgiving is celebrated in the US on the fourth Thursday of November each year. Even though a few other countries also celebrate Thanksgiving, it’s still considered a uniquely American holiday, one that au pairs look forward to experiencing. You can learn more about it here.

I really enjoyed Thanksgiving with my host family. It was as I imagined! So much food to try. Everyone got dressed up and shared what they were thankful for. It was so warm and special. The next day we began to prepare for Christmas. It was magical.” Selina from Germany

Below you will find some tips to help you have a terrific Thanksgiving experience!

 

Host Parents

1.  Please plan to include your au pair in your Thanksgiving celebration, if at all possible. Thanksgiving with an au pair offers an opportunity to consider the relevance of the history and meaning of Thanksgiving as you compare the hospitality offered by the Native Americans to the recently arrived Pilgrims and the hospitality you offer your au pair.

2.  If you are traveling or will not be able to invite your au pair to join you for Thanksgiving, give her plenty of notice and help her make alternate plans. You don’t want to leave your au pair alone over the holiday.

Au Pairs

3.  If you are invited to attend Thanksgiving dinner, please let your family know as soon as possible whether you are planning to attend. It is considered rude in America to accept the invitation and then change your mind later. Please be thoughtful.

4.  Make sure to discuss time off during the holiday weekend. Many host families work the Friday after Thanksgiving so do not assume you have this day off or the entire weekend. Talk to your host family BEFORE you make any plans.

5.  If your host family is unable to include you in their Thanksgiving plans, please let me know if you have trouble making other plans. You may be able to join a friend and their host family for the holiday dinner.

Bonus Tip for the Kids

If you are looking for a fun holiday recipe, check out these turkey cupcakes. Find more fun crafts, activities and recipes on the Au Pair in America Fall Holidays pinboard.

Photo: Tim Sackton (Flickr)

NEW CHILD CAR SEAT LAW IN CT

As of October 1, 2017, Connecticut has enacted a new law governing car seats. It strengthens car seat (“motor vehicles child restraint system”) requirements for children. It increases the threshold age or weight at which a child must be placed in a Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV)-approved rear-facing child restraint from under age one or less than 20 pounds to under age two or less than 30 pounds. It increases, from six to seven, the maximum age at which children must be secured in certain types of child restraints, including booster seats, and requires that all child restraints be equipped with a five-point harness. It also prohibits people from placing a child in a rear-facing child restraint in the front seat of any vehicle with a functional air bag on the passenger side.

Penalties for non-compliance can be severe:

The bill subjects violators to existing law’s penalties. As under existing law, a first violation is an infraction and a second violation is punishable by a fine of up to $199. Each subsequent violation is a class A misdemeanor, punishable by up to one year in prison, a fine of up to $2,000, or both.

The DMV commissioner must require anyone who commits a first or second violation to attend a DMV-approved child car seat safety course. The commissioner, after providing notice and an opportunity for a hearing, may suspend for up to two months the driver’s license of a violator who fails to attend or successfully complete the course.

You may read the details here.

DRIVING WITH KIDS IN THE CAR

Driving with kids in the car can be particularly distracting especially if there is crying, whining, or some other issue that warrants attention. It is hard to ignore children who want attention, but when you are driving you need to remain focused on DRIVING!

  1. Be prepared. Before you put the kids in the car, make sure you have items that they may need easily on hand or within reach. For babies, plan to feed them before you depart– eating in the car may not be the best practice due to your limited ability to react to choking or spills. For older kids, put snacks, drinks and toys within easy reach. In all cases, make sure that any heavier items such as video games or larger books have a place to be stored (such as in the seatback pockets) so that they won’t become potential projectiles in the event of a crash.
  2. Make them wait. As unpleasant as it can be, tell the kids that you cannot help because you are driving and that they will need to wait until you can pull over or until you get to your destination. You may have to listen to a tantrum, but at least the child is restrained in a seat and cannot hurt anyone.
  3. Keep your eyes forward. Resist the urge to reach back or take your eyes off the road even when you’re stopped. It only takes a second for an accident to occur.
  4. Pull over. If you cannot deal with screaming and need to tend to your child immediately, pull over to a safe spot. It’s safer to get off the highway than move to the side of the road where you could face other hazards such as the possibility of getting struck by another vehicle.
  5. Use your mirrors. If your children are in rear-facing car seats, attach a mirror to the head restraint to be able to monitor them. It’s comforting to know you can still monitor the kids if there is something wrong without turning around.
  6. Set the ground rules. Educate children on car safety. Tell them that drivers need to pay attention to the road, so that everyone is safe. If they know you can’t and won’t react, then they won’t expect it.
  7. Distract the children. Try to distract whining children by engaging them in a song or game outside of the car. Children’s music in the CD player or on satellite radio is a nice addition. Pointing out school buses, fire trucks, and traffic lights always seems to work and soon they forget what was bothering them in the first place.
  8. Stay off the phone. For the safety of yourself and your children (and others on the road), do not use the cell phone to talk or text. You’re carrying precious cargo and your job is to transport them safely. IT IS AGAINST THE LAW TO USE THE CELL PHONE WHILE YOU ARE DRIVING! If you need to make a call, pull over to a safe place.

BUS STOP SAFETY

School has Started – Be Safe at the Bus Stop

  1. Be on time to the bus stop so that you and your host kids get there safely.
  2. Walk and hold hands to the stop.
  3. Stand on the sidewalk or the grass, not in the street.
  4. Wait until the bus comes to a complete stop before the children walk to the door.
  5. Let the bus driver open the door. Do not try to push it open.
  6. Remind the children to sit on the bus and not stand. If there are seat belts, remind them to put them on.
  7. Let the bus leave before you do, just in case there is a problem.
  8. Be at the afternoon return bus stop in plenty of time, before it comes. There are times when it will be early.
  9. The driver is not allowed to let small children off the bus unless someone greets them, so if you are not there the children will be taken back to school. BE THERE.
  10. The bus driver will not leave until you are safely on your side of the street, so if you need to cross the street, do it in front of the bus.

THE BACKPACK— Keeping it Organized

The back pack is very important to review every day. It is one of the important links between school and home. Backpacks quickly become disorganized and notices missed if not emptied every day. Here is a suggested daily routine that you can follow, or supervise your host children as they do it, depending on their age(s):

  1.  After the student arrives home, empty the backpack on a table.
    2. Find the homework. Set it out in the homework area with all the supplies needed to complete the homework.
    3. Put the lunch box in the kitchen. Empty it, discard the garbage, and see if the child actually ate the lunch that was packed. Wipe out the lunch box. Let host parents know what was not eaten.
    4. Find all notices sent home with the child. Find anything that needs to be filled out by the parents. If it is your responsibility to keep track of activities, put them on the calendar now. If not, make sure the parents see them.
    5. Make sure permission slips, fundraiser notices, book orders, photo notices and anything else that must be signed is done on time. Make sure these items get back in the backpack and the child turns them in on time. If a signed form and money is still in the back pack when the child comes home, the child forgot to give it to the teacher. Remind the child, tell the parent.
    6. All completed homework should be put in the homework folder in the backpack as soon as the homework is completed. Make sure there is a sturdy folder to put the homework in; this way the child knows where it is when he or she arrives at school, and the homework will stay neater 🙂
    7. In the morning, recheck for homework. Is it in the folder? Are all permission slips and notices requiring money in the backpack?
    8. Make lunch and put the lunch box in the backpack. If the lunch box is in the backpack there is less chance it will be left on the bus.
    9. Does the child need to bring anything else to school that day? Maybe he or she needs gym clothes, or something for show and tell. Put it in the backpack!
    10. At the end of the week, make sure all work sent home is placed out for the parents to see. Any dirty gym clothes are taken out of the backpack and put in the laundry. The back pack and the lunch box should be wiped out and kept clean.

MINIMIZING MORNING MADNESS

It’s important to have effective morning routines so children get off to school without stress. Older children can help plan their routines.

Here are some specific ideas for minimizing morning madness on school days:

  • Prepare the night before. Make lunch, pack backpacks, and set out clothes.
  • Set up a launching pad—a place near the door for children’s backpacks, coats, shoes, hats and gloves so no time is wasted looking for these items.
  • Wake up at least half an hour before the kids. Shower, get dressed, have your coffee/breakfast, and be ready!
  • Have a reliable wake up system for the kids. An alarm clock or clock radio is good.
  • Stagger wake up times for the kids. Pre-teen and teenagers usually need more time to shower and groom.
  • Younger kids should bathe the night before to reduce bathroom congestion.
  • Have kids choose what they are wearing the night before. Limit choices and make sure everything is neat and clean.
  • Don’t rush the children! Make sure there is enough time to wash, dress, eat breakfast, comb hair and brush teeth. Start earlier if you need to.
  • Avoid turning on the TV. Kids can waste a lot of time watching TV or playing. These activities should be permitted only if they are completely ready for school.
  • Don’t skip breakfast! Hungry kids can’t concentrate in school.
  • Remind kids to use the bathroom just before leaving for school. Lots of kids don’t like to use the school bathroom.
  • Wish the kids a great day. Give them each a hug!

Preventing Dehydration in Hot Weather

Dehydration means that the body lacks the necessary amount of fluid. In hot weather, infants and small children are more likely to become dehydrated than older children or adults because they can lose relatively more fluid quickly.

Here are some steps to take to make sure children remain hydrated in the summer months:

  • Encourage children to drink plenty of water. On hot days, children should drink significantly more water than usual, as they are losing more due to the heat.
  • Do not wait until a child is thirsty to offer water. By the time children feel thirsty, they are already becoming dehydrated.
  • If your child is resistant to drinking enough water, have other liquids on hand for your child to drink throughout the day.
  • Be alert to changes in behavior. A child may act confused or more irritable when they are becoming dehydrated/overheated. Get them into cooler temperatures and drinking more fluids.
  • Dress your child in lightweight clothing in the summer months, particularly if she’ll be playing outdoors in warm weather. Consider clothes that are well ventilated as they do not trap heat close to the body.
  • When there are heat and/or air quality advisories because the weather is dangerously hot, you should avoid taking children outdoors. Check with your host parents for further guidance on this topic.

Remember to follow these tips for yourself too, so you stay well hydrated!

Photo: Darwin Bell (Flickr)