Monthly Archives: July 2016

Heading Home

By Robin Leon

You made it! Your time in the US has flown by, and now it’s time to plan for your return. Think about all of the time and effort you put into preparing for your arrival in the US – interviews, paperwork, training. It makes sense that your return home would also require some thought.

Photo: Skyseeker (Flickr)

Photo: Skyseeker (Flickr)

Of course you expected US culture to be new, but do you anticipate your home culture to be familiar and without difficulties? This is often not the case. In many ways, the experience of returning home can mirror the experience of arriving in the US. Change can be stressful, but thinking about these transitions ahead of time can make them less scary.

For au pairs, the reentry process begins in the eighth month when return flight packets are received. At this time feelings can be mixed, and au pairs may feel very confused as they anticipate the return home but are not ready for the US experience to end. For those returning at the end of the first year, they must select a travel date, deal with questions and excitement from family and friends at home and, with three months left, continue to keep focused on their au pair duties.

As the departure date nears, there is a flurry of activity – you’re trying to get everything done, packing, and seeing all your friends one more time. It can be tempting to disengage from friends and your host family – keep in mind, even if you’re not aware of it, it’s easier to leave angry than it is to leave sad. Be aware of these emotions and remember that they can impact your host family and host kids too. Talk to a trusted friend or your Community Counselor.

Now you’re home! When you first arrive, everyone will be so happy to see you, and you may feel like a visiting celebrity. This will fade though, and your friends and family may no longer be interested in hearing dozens of stories of your adventures in the US or seeing hundreds of photos of you and your new friends. They will move on and be ready for you to do the same, which leads us too…

Reverse Culture Shock – when you first return home, your family and friends may wonder who you are, who you’ve become. You may be thinking about how much you’ve changed, while everything and everyone at home has stayed the same. It may be tempting to romanticize your time in the US – everything was perfect there! There were friends who understood you! You may also experience a “parent problem” – you’ve been independent and had lots of freedom during your time in the US. It can be hard to go back to being someone’s child or following someone else’s rules.

This culture shock is not permanent. It takes time, but eventually, you will get back into the swing of things, and you’ll begin to relax into life in your home country, carrying with you the experiences you had as an au pair.

Tips for Transition:

• Talk to your Community Counselor – we are here to help you with all phases of your au pair experience, including your return home.
• Take some time to really think about your experiences in the US – what did you like most? What will you miss? How have you changed? What recommendations would you make to someone considering becoming an au pair?
• Think about challenges you may face when you return home.
• Think of skills and activities that helped you adapt to the US. These may be strategies that you can use to help you adapt back into your home country.
• Set short term and long term goals for after you return home. Think about ways that you can use the new skills that you gained during your time in America.
• Think about how your Host Family and kids are feeling. What can you do as a group to help with the transition? Think about how you can have a successful closure with them. Also, think about how your return may feel for your friends and family in your home country. What questions and concerns might they have?
• Keep talking – stay in touch with the au pairs and other friends you met along the way – it can be nice to talk with someone who had a shared experience with you.
• Develop ways to continue your exposure to American culture and language.

Photo: Kristina Zuidema

Photo: Kristina Zuidema (Flickr)

By Christine Connally  Does your au pair have to do a last minute supermarket run to buy milk; is she taking the kids to the zoo and needs to buy everyone’s lunch or pay for the carousel ride? Whether you use a cookie jar with random spare cash, a petty cash box with a set amount per week or give your her a credit or debit card while requesting receipts, it is important that you have a conversation about how to handle miscellaneous expenses as soon as your au pair arrives. This allows you to set the ground rules for what the money is and is not to be used for, etc. and will avoid money-related misunderstandings early on.

Host Families

  • It’s important to be clear about how long the money should last and what types of expenses are approved.
  • Let the au pair know whether or not you expect receipts.
  • Clarify any instances of perceived misuse or misunderstandings during your weekly meetings. Do not allow it to fester.

Au Pairs

  • Only spend the money on pre-approved expenses.
  • If there is a type of expense that you are not sure about, ask first.
  • Put your receipts in the cookie jar on the same day the expense occurs to avoid any confusion.
  • Clarify any misunderstandings during your weekly meeting.  Do not allow it to fester.

Gas and Fare Cards

Host families are responsible for the au pair’s transportation costs:

  • to and from classes and cluster meetings
  • driving the kids

It is a good idea to determine  how much gas an au pair will use for these trips and either put gas in the car or give a gas allowance.   If your au pair is riding to classes or cluster meetings with another au pair, you should offer to share the cost of gas.

Au pairs are responsible for their own transportation when they are off duty.  Au pairs should replace the amount of gas used for personal use.

Keeping Our Kids Safe and Healthy This Summer

By Catherine McEaddy-Holmes (Excerpt)

Summer can be a wonderful time of year full of adventure and fun, but it can also be a time when routines are unsettled and rules are relaxed. I encourage you to think about ways that you can keep your children safe and healthy. The American Academy of Pediatrics’ Healthy Children website has many excellent articles on how you can help your family have a wonderful and healthy summer. Below are some highlights with links to the full articles.

Sun Safety

  • Keep infants 6 months or younger out of direct sun.
  • Cover up with protective clothing and hat and dress in cool layers. Wear protective sunglasses.
  • Play outdoors in the early morning and limit your exposure to sun between 10 am and 4 pm.
  • Use a broad-spectrum sunscreen and apply it often.

Heat Safety

  • Reduce intensity of outdoor activities during times of high heat & humidity.
  • In Washington, DC smog can also cause days when the air is unsafe for young children to be outdoors. You can check the daily index here.
  • Children and adults should be allowed to drink water liberally and freely. When outdoors take a break for water every 20 minutes.
  • NEVER leave a child in a car. Heatstroke and death can occur quickly. Always check the backseat to make sure all children are out of the car. Leave your purse or wallet on the backseat when you are driving to remind you to check when you arrive at your destination.

Insects

Summertime brings an onslaught of bugs- some of which can cause diseases like West Nile Virus, Lyme Disease and Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever. Stay up-to-date on your region and how to prevent these diseases spread by insects.

Prepare a summer first-aid kit for bug bites and more:

  • Be prepared for allergic reactions from bug bites. Benadryl is probably the most important over-the-counter medication to have in your first aid kit to treat insect bites, hives, and other allergic reactions. As always, check with your host family about what medications to use.
  • Hydrocortisone ointment can help the itches that come from bites.
  • Use bug spray containing DEET or picaridin.

 Swimming Safety

  • Review swimming rules with your children.
  • Always make sure an adult who is able to swim is watching children when they are in the water.
  • Take steps to prevent drowning.
  • Learn the signs of dry or delayed drowning.
Photo: Flickr

Photo: Flickr