Category Archives: Host Family Tips

Holiday & Vacation Reminders

“Rest and be thankful.” – William Wordsworth

Holidays and vacations are a great opportunity to rest, recharge and explore the U.S.

Memorial Day Weekend is the unofficial start of summer travel season. Here are some reminders about program rules regarding holidays and vacations.

Holidays

  • Host families are not required to give au pairs any specific holidays.
  • Each host family will make different arrangements on holidays, some au pairs will be off and others will be required to work.
  • Au pairs should not make plans for holidays without checking with your host family first.

Vacations

  • Au pairs earns 2 weeks of paid vacation during the course of her year.
  • Vacation time should be mutually agreed upon.
  • All vacation should be preplanned (at least 4 weeks in advance.)
  • All au pair’s friends and/or family visits/vacations should be pre-approved prior to purchasing tickets.
  • If an au pair travels with her host family, it should be discussed in advance whether this is the au pair’s vacation or if she is working.
  • If an au pair travels with the host family to work, the host family is required to pay for her transportation, lodging and meals.

Important: If an au pair is traveling outside of the U.S., she must have her DS2019 signed (travel validation) PRIOR to her departure from the US. More information about this may be found here on the Au Pair in America website.

Photo: torbakhopper (Flickr)

Handling Expenses

Host parents often ask for suggestions on how best to handle common expenses that occur as au pairs are caring for the children.

Miscellaneous Expenses

There are different ways to handle the little day to day expenses that come up.  Things like when an au pair takes the kids out for ice cream or picks up a gallon of milk.  Some families keep a cookie jar fund, a little cash that they set aside weekly or monthly for these types of expenses. Others give their au pair a prepaid debit card for this purpose. Below are some suggestions for avoiding problems with expenses.

Host Families

  • It’s important to be clear about how long this money should last and what types of expenses are approved.
  • Let the au pair know whether or not you expect receipts.

Au Pairs

  • Only spend the money on approved expenses.
  • If it is something you are not sure about, ask first.
  • Put your receipts in the cookie jar in place of the money to avoid any confusion.

Gas and Fare Cards 

Host families are responsible for the au pair’s transportation costs: to and from classes, cluster meetings and when driving the kids.

It is a good idea to figure out how much gas an au pair will use for these trips and either put gas in the car or give a gas allowance.   If your au pair is riding to classes or cluster meetings with another au pair, you should offer to share the cost of gas.

Au pairs are responsible for their own transportation at all other times.  You should replace the amount of gas used for personal use.

Photo: Andrea Travillian

Screen-Shot-2012-09-28-at-3_32_24-PM-300x103Maryland’s Child Passenger Safety Law

(Effective October 1, 2012)

• Every child under 8 years old must ride in an appropriate child restraint* unless the child is 4 feet, 9 inches or taller.

• Every child from 8 to 16 years old who is not secured in a child restraint must be secured in a vehicle seat belt.

Protect your children as they ride!

Children under 13 years old should ride in the back seat. The back seat is the safest.

Transitioning to a new au pair

Full version is at http://aupairinamerica.com/resources/host_family_tips/transtioning.asp>

Here are some things to think about which might help everyone in your household prepare for your au pair’s departure:

~Young children perceive time differently than adults. Therefore, your preparation for the departure should not begin too far in advance.

~Discuss the possibility of staying in touch with letters, e-mail, or even pictures if your child does not write. Be sure you have the au pair’s address, and make plans to write.

~Create a small photo album for your children to look at. After your au pair leaves this can hold important memories for them.

~Make sure there is an opportunity to say good-bye. Make it clear when it will be the last time your children will be seeing the au pair.

~If you are having another au pair arrive, discuss the arrival plans with your child.

August 15 Celebrate the Completion of the Transcontinental Railroad

In 1870 the last spike was nailed to complete the coast-to-coast railroad.  This train track helped to open up the western area of the US to development.  Trains still hold a fascination – whether it is Thomas the Tank, Brio or electric trains, children love to build tracks.

Baltimore has a wonderful Train Museum. Check it out on www.borail.org and look for the Calendar of Events under Kids’ Zone.

Changes to the Maryland Driver's Handbook

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From the MVA website:
Beginning October 2011, the knowledge test you must pass to get a non-commercial Class C learner’s permit will be based on information in the new Maryland Driver’s Manual. The new Manual includes basic knowledge on driver safety for new drivers, including: traffic laws of this State; highway signs regulating, warning & directing traffic; and safe driving practices.  The improved graphics, full-color design, and brief paragraphs provide an easy read of only 39 pages – packed with core driver safety facts.

I have updated the links (on the column to the right) to include the New Driver’s Handbook in English, Spanish and an audio version. Paper copies are available in MVA offices.

There is now one booklet instead of two. The yellow booklet that contains the information on who needs a driver’s license and who does not, which I have given out to be kept in the car, will probably not be available after September.

What to keep in the car for proof now?
I have obtained a copy of the Maryland Law regarding International Drivers. The information is copied directly from a booklet which all police officers have in their squad car. The idea is that it shows them where to look up the law and once they compare your paper to that section of their booklet, they should realize that au pairs are allowed to drive on their country license (for up to one year.) Sometimes, they will still choose to write you the ticket for not having a Maryland license. If that happens, don’t worry. You can go to court and the judge should drop the ticket, as long as you are in your first year and have a valid license from your home country in your possession.

I have uploaded this document on Google Docs. You may access it HERE and print a copy for each car the au pair drives.

Privacy and The Internet

fb twitter youtubeJust a reminder about how important it is to respect your host family’s privacy and not share personal details and information.  This applies to all kinds of situations, including: personal conversations, email and social websites.

For your own safety, it is a good idea to be careful what personal information you share about yourself as well. You should not be giving out information like your telephone number and address to people you don’t know.

Once you post something on the internet (even if you later delete it), it can show up elsewhere.  Unless you have specific permission from the host family, you should not post pictures of them, their children or their home on the internet.

If you have a blog or website where you post in your native language, remember there is translation software.  So, even if you say it in your native language, be sure it is not something you will regret.

Childcare Around the World

Each au pair arrives in the U.S. with her own child minding style and expectations. These individual differences spring from her own experiences in her own family as well as from cultural styles typical of her home country. Throughout the world parents want the best for their children, but what is best in one country may not be considered best in another.

Child care customs, games and songs are not universal and no au pair arrives knowing how parents in the U.S. raise and educate their children. This is just one of many aspects of our culture that are unfamiliar to au pairs when they arrive. Much time is spent at orientation educating au pairs about the patterns and expectations in this country. Host families can help their au pairs learn to adjust to American family expectations while the family learns to understand their au pair. Differences in expectations and style underscore the need for adequate orientation to the expectations of your household.

Au pairs will generally be surprised by the abundance of toys and activities typical of most American homes. Their inclination is likely to be towards more imaginative play, unstructured time outside and less directed playtime generally. The pace set by the classes many children attend adds to a hectic lifestyle unfamiliar to many au pairs.

When it comes to discipline, the majority of American parents tend to give choices, reward, and explain, generally being more permissive and “democratic” than is common in other cultures. Au pairs need help in understanding and accepting these practices as otherwise they may just see the children as manipulative or disrespectful when they voice their opinions and negotiate.

The cultural exchange nature of the Au Pair in America program ensures that au pairs are interested in and committed to learning about new ways of caring for children. Keep a discussion open about differences in parenting styles and be sure to help your au pair learn as much as she can about American child rearing.