Most American parents want their children to be independent and responsible, and have a positive image of themselves. A child’s self image is based on how the child sees himself or herself. This is called self-esteem. It is defined by the judgments children make about their own self worth. Self-esteem can be positive or negative. In America, positive self-esteem is very important.
A child may have positive or high self-esteem at different points in his/her life and negative or low self-esteem at other times. Most preschool-aged children typically have very high self-esteem. As children get older, their peers become more critical of each other and can affect a child’s self-esteem. As children move into the elementary school and middle school their self-esteem can decrease for a period of time due to the criticism from their friends.
There are several ways for parents and au pairs to build positive self-esteem in children and have them feel good about themselves. The suggestions include:
- Providing warmth, support and praise
- Using positive discipline
- Being responsive to a child’s needs
- Having reasonable, age-appropriate expectations of a child
- Developing and enforcing consistent limits
- Providing opportunities for a child to make choices
- Providing opportunities for a child to explore, investigate and problem-solve
- Encouraging a child to be responsible for their actions
- Expressing interest in a child and his or her activities.
- Helping a child handle disappointment and failure.
- Providing opportunities for a child to succeed.
- Providing opportunities for a child to help other people.