How the Au pair program affected Adult Children from Former Host Families.

(Excerpted from Au Pair in America Program Outcomes- Perspectives of Host Children 1999-2017)

 

Cassie Heine and Catie Steidl, AIFS program Researchers stated:

“The host children love and learned from their Au pairs. As a result, their eyes were open to the world beyond the doorsteps of their home.”

 Catie “When children are raised to think of cross-cultural understanding, interaction and the embrace of difference and diversity as the norm, they are guaranteed to grow into similarly tolerant young people and adults who are interested in and enthusiastic about the positive aspects of cultural understanding.”

The impact Statistics gained from surveying 4000 former host children now age 21 or older:

An ability to accept differences in other people- 88%

An appreciation for global cuisine- 81%

A desire for more diverse friendships and social networks-71%

A better understanding of myself and my values- 71%

The Au pair affected their lives in a positive way- 99%

Would you have an Au pair care for your children- 94%

I consider the Au pair who lived with us to be like family-92%

 62% of adult children of APIA can comfortably hold a conversation in a different language. Only 26% of American-born citizens can do this.

College-age children of APIA were 7x more likely to study abroad.

 Quotes from former host children:

Caitlin Age 25 New Jersey:

“They broadened my horizons and showed me that people everywhere live different and interesting, but equally beautiful lives. Through them I learned about different languages, food, architecture, and displays of friendship. I wanted to know more about people, and I wanted to go on adventures because of them.”

Madeleine, age 26 Massachusetts:

“I attended my former Au pair’s weddings. I’ve met their parents and their children. To me, to everyone in my family, they are Family. I feel like they will stay that way for the rest of my life.”

Feeling homesick is a normal feeling when you first arrive as an Au pair. YOU CAN GET THROUGH IT! It just takes a little time and some effort on your part. Tell yourself that you can live with being uncomfortable for a short time. Trust yourself that you made the right decision. Trust me when I say it will get better and your whole year is ahead of you. Fun times and lifetime friends await you. GO GET THEM!

Almost everyone experiences homesickness and culture shock to some degree when they come to live in a completely new environment. So much is different and it takes time to adjust.

It is normal to miss your own family, at home. Try to remember that they support you and want you to make the most of this experience. Your family and friends back home will enjoy learning more about the U.S., through your eyes, as you share your adventures with them.

Top 5 Tips for Dealing with Homesickness

1. Make Friends – Don’t wait for other au pairs to reach out to you, reach out to them. There are lots of new au pairs who are feeling the same way you are right now. Set a goal to reach out to a few of them each day. Some will respond and some will not. Don’t let that discourage you. No one will ever be mad at you for sending them a message to say hello or ask if they want to do something together. Make friends from various countries and you will also get a chance to practice your English skills together.

2. Stay in touch with your home country, but not too much. Skyping or talking on the phone every day with your family and/or friends back home normally makes homesickness worse. Try to lessen your contact by every other day and slowly to once a week, until you feel stronger. It’s much harder seeing the faces and hearing the voices of those you miss.

3. Get out of the house (or your room specifically) – Attend your zoom cluster meetings! Ask your host family how you can be social with other Au pairs outside of their home. Perhaps you can have coffee or meet outside with other au pairs, join a gym, go to the library, go for a walk, visit the mall, get a manicure, visit a museum. If someone invites you out, say “yes”. Also, don’t be afraid to do the inviting. If your host family invites you to do things with them, say “yes.” This will help you get to know each other and contribute to your overall happiness.

4. Realize that it definitely gets better – All au pairs experience homesickness and the vast majority of them get through it, stay and have a successful year (some even extend for a second year!) So, it must get better, right? Once you get past the initial homesickness, most au pairs report how quickly the year goes by.

5. Make Plans – Create your own Au Pair Bucket List (places you want to go, new foods to try, new things to experience during your year in the U.S.) and start doing them now. Post on our cluster Facebook group to find others who may want to join you on your adventures.

Photo by:  Shimelle Laine (Flickr)