Love in the USA
What Every Au Pair Needs To Know
Love in the USA for an Au Pair can be difficult. Au pairs are independent young women who by their very nature are adventurous. Moving away from home, country, culture, friends and family takes a brave heart! This spirit of adventure also plays out while here, meeting and making new friends, and sometimes new love. Here are some of the challenges that one must consider for that relationship in the USA.
- Meeting men is easy, deciding who is worthy is hard.
Social media can be dangerous, filled with those who want to prey on a lonely heart. Bars and pubs, can be a place where date rape drugs can easily be used.
Never meet a man for the first time alone. Take several friends along and let them help you “judge” his intention. When out never leave your drink unattended and never drink something that you didn’t see poured from its original container. Drink responsibly, in the presence of those you don’t know. Never leave a bar with someone you just met. Stick with your friends, and take care of each other.
- While independent in spirit, Au Pairs live in a host family’s home. Host families have a responsibility to protect themselves and you. Many will have rules about who comes and goes in their home and who drives their car. Before you overstep the boundary as a live-in Au Pair, ask your host family how they feel about your dating, what rules they would like to discuss with you. Never bring home a stranger to your host home. Be respectful of the young age of your host children, and their understanding of love and sex. Keep in mind that your culture may be more relaxed about this subject than Americans. Every host family has their own way of discussing this with their children. If you have made a special relationship and feel confident about your new love, ask the host family to meet your new partner.
3.Love sick, it can happen! Don’t let it cause you to lose focus on your goals as an Au Pair. Caring for children is a very important job. Your host family trusts you with their children. Make their safety and happiness your main priority.
4.Protect your health. If you are sexually active, being mindful of sexually transmitted disease is important. As well as, preventing an unwanted pregnancy. Many diseasing are unnoticeable and can go undetected for years, causing issues with having children later in life and in some cases can lead to some forms of female cancers. Be smart and learn how to protect yourself.
5.“I do” Getting Married is wonderful, just not when you are an Au Pair. The rules for the cultural exchange visa in which your Au Pair year is based, does not allow an Au Pair to be married. Getting married, would automatically end your year, along with your medical insurance. Let a professional advisor guide you on how to best coordinate your end of Au Pair year and a marriage. There are many legal complexities. Speak with your community counselor and host family and be open about your intentions to get married. We want you to be happy and can help to support your goal.