Homesickness can be a problem during the holidays, even if it hasn’t been at any other time of the year. Au pairs often miss their friends and family, familiar places and their own traditions and customs. The holiday activities in the United States seem, and may actually be, different just at a time when an au pair would welcome something familiar.

It is common for au pairs’ emotions to be close to the surface during the holidays. Her highs are higher, her lows are lower. The enormity of what she has done–actually living in another country (which is an amazing thing when you think about it!)–hits her and throws her into a self-protective mode.

Host parents can help her through this unfamiliar territory by talking to her about what your specific family activities will be (gifts, meals, visitors, religious services, in-home traditions, or none of these, as the case may be.) In the spirit of cultural exchange, ask her if she has any favorite holiday traditions or foods that you might be able to incorporate into your family’s celebration of the season. Let her know what you will be doing, when you will be doing it, and what she can expect. Talk to her about what has to be accomplished and get her involved and interested. Don’t expect her to just “know” what needs to be done. Give her some clear, agreed upon assignments. Make her feel a part of things. And, let her know her contribution is needed and appreciated.

1. School breaks during holidays; ask your host family how your schedule will change during the break to make sure you and they are ready.
2. Talk to your host family about how they celebrate the holidays.
3. Share some holiday traditions from your country with your host family.
4. Ask your host family which activities they really want you to join in; dinner with relatives, holiday gatherings, baking, decorating, and religious services.
5. Discuss your plans for the holidays; parties or events you wish time off for well in advance, so your host family can plan.
6. Be careful, accidents happen when children are very excited.  Know when to calm them down, so you can avoid accidents before they happen.
7. Try to keep the kids on as much of a regular schedule as possible.  Kids will get over tired and cranky if there are too many activities in one day or several days in a row.  Try to help limit the activities to a few a day or week.
8. Give kids downtime with quiet activities, like reading a holiday story or watching a holiday DVD.
9. Make sure you and the kids get plenty of sleep.
10. Remember to prepare some gifts for your host family, especially for the kids.  I recommend books, crafts, or games.  You can read the books, do the crafts, play the games with them.
11. Take some time for yourself; to shop, to spend with friends, to call home.  Remember it is a stressful time, even if it is fun and exciting.  You are far from home and you may feel a bit homesick.
12.  Don’t make promises to the kids that you can’t keep.  Don’t promise to go to an event and then cancel because you would rather be out with your friends.
13. Go to your host children’s school holiday activities, the class party, the winter concert, etc.
14. Offer to talk to their class about how you celebrate holidays in your country.  Do a craft with the class.  Earn a Global Awareness letter or certificate.  Ask me for help.
15. Participate in family holiday traditions whenever possible.  Be available to help the parents watch the kids while they decorate the house, prepare holiday foods, or attend holiday parties.
16. Come to our cluster Holiday Party!