Struggling with accessibility or the rising costs of childcare in California? Hosting an au pair might be the solution you’ve been searching for. In this interview, we speak with Au Pair in America host mom Jenny who shares her heartfelt story of how an au pair has transformed her family’s life. From navigating personal tragedy to creating lasting cultural connections, Jenny describes how this unique childcare option has provided affordable, reliable support for her and her family.
Join us as Jenny in California opens up about her childcare journey with Au Pair in America, sharing how hosting an au pair has brought flexibility, cultural enrichment, and invaluable support to her family during challenging times.
Robin: Hi everyone, I’m Robin Leon with Au Pair in America. I’m here with Jenny, one of our host moms from California. Jenny, we’re so excited to talk with you about your experience hosting an au pair. Would you mind taking a minute to introduce yourself—where you’re from, how many kiddos you have, and what kind of work you do.
Jenny: My name is Jenny, I live outside Sacramento, California, I have two kiddos. They’re four-and-a-half-year-old twins. And I started with the program about two years ago.
Robin: I love hearing about families with multiple children who enjoy the program—I know your needs can be a little bit different than the average, run of the mill family.
Would you recommend the au pair program to other parents? And if so, why?
Jenny: I would recommend the au pair program to other parents. My current au pair is just coming up on two years—she’s extended with us. We’re all so sad to see her go, but we’re bringing in another au pair. I would recommend the au pair program so strongly—it’s been amazing for us. I want anyone who’s caring for our children to feel like they’re part of our family—it just creates a different environment, a different warmth, and relationship… the additional flexibility… ultimately, it’s great to have someone here, and I feel like they’re part of the family in caring for the children.
Robin: We love hearing about au pairs really feeling like members of the family. About the flexibility you touched on… because the au pair lives with you, he or she is ready to go when you are, which I know is helpful for families.
How do you balance your needs as a family and your au pair’s needs and thread that needle of cultural exchange?
Jenny: My au pair is from the Czech Republic. It’s so funny, the word for goat is “koza,” so we now don’t call goats “goats,” we call them “koza.” It’s this word that’s now embedded in our brains and it’s cute—my son will use some Czech words here and there like “please” and “thank you” and some other random words like “pinecone” and “dandelion.” Also, [our au pair] has shared her food with us—we are adoring fans of her schnitzel and beg her for it routinely… so we have fun like that.
Her mom got to stay with us for a week and we were so thrilled. She stayed with us, and she didn’t [speak] much English, but we all worked through it, and one of my sons cuddled up to her faster even than he did with the au pair and decided that she was his and he didn’t want her to go. Again, she just feels like extended family. So, it’s wonderful, and we’re looking forward to visiting her and having her visit with us again.
Robin: Those long-term relationships are so beautiful and how [au pairs become] extended family and allows for travels and visits for years to come…
Jenny: Yeah! And how we balance the cultural exchange… I take it so seriously. When I was in high school, I was in Germany as an exchange student. I’ve traveled a lot internationally for work prior to having my boys. I value that experience for her, but obviously I have a lot on my plate and need her help. Her time off is her time off. I don’t edge into that, I respect that. If we made commitments and she clears it with me… I don’t encroach on it. I make sure that she feels open during the week when she’s on her off time, so she can do what she wants. She has her vacations, and she’s used her education credit time to travel. She went to Hawaii and went to the photo class there which is something she always wanted to do. So, I just try to support her.
The other piece that I’m fortunate about… I do have a dedicated car for the au pair, and I have shared with her that she can put up to 5,000 of her personal miles on the car per year so she can feel comfortable traveling. Where we are in Northern California—we’re a couple of hours from Tahoe, a couple hours from San Francisco, and a day trip from some national parks. I set a boundary upfront to make us more comfortable. So, if she took a road trip to the east coast and back, I’d feel like that was her use of the car for the year. Obviously, it’s arbitrary, nobody’s really tracking miles, but it just gave us both a chance for us to feel comfortable that she can use the car. And I do prioritize that because I want her to get out and have fun. And the more she connects and has fun, the better she is and happier she is to be home, the more rested she is, and the more engaged she is, as well.
Consistent Support After Devastating Accidents
The last piece is, four weeks to the day after [the au pair] arrived, one of my sons had a horrible accident—nothing to do with the au pair. He has a severe brain injury and has medical needs now and she stayed with us and has been an amazing, amazing support. She is a beacon of consistency for my other son, who has essentially lost his twin brother in most of the important ways. Because of this, we now travel quite a bit for my injured son and his medical care needs. She travels with us—she’s so integral to everything. We’ve traveled to New Orleans for a couple months, for phoenix for a week, and to Mexico on two separate occasions for a month as we pursued some experimental treatments. Her Spanish is better than ours, so she helps us out with [speaking] Spanish and we appreciate that, too.
Robin: She sounds like an amazing person, gosh, what a special relationship you’ve formed through these challenges, my goodness.
Going back to the car… I heard you saying, “open and honest communication,” that seems to be such a huge part of a successful relationship between an au pair and a host family, and it sounds like you really made that a priority from the start, so kudos to you.
Jenny: We do, absolutely. And again, we’ve had this accident and my son who is not injured has a lot of trauma, so he has a therapist. My au pair, the therapist, and I sit down and discuss how to help him, and she talks to the therapist about what she can do and what’s going on and what we can try to do best to help him.
Robin: We often say that the au pair feels like a big sister, and a member of the family, but gosh, what a testament to the dedication of this young person.
Jenny: Yeah, she is so special.
Can you talk about the cost of childcare in your area of California?
Jenny: Yeah, [childcare in my area is] very expensive, particularly with twins. I started with the au pair program when they were two and a half… full-time care at that point was probably $1,000/week, maybe more. I switched to a half day program with the boys by the time the au pair started, so it was probably $1,200-$1,400/month with the au pair helping from lunch time on. And of course, one [child] is not in childcare right now, and the other one has continued a half day program and switched to a special program with the public schools. I get a half day four or five days a week. He will be going to a public TK (transitional kindergarten) starting in a few weeks… so I would say full-time infant care is at least as much as the au pair program if not more.
How available is childcare in your area of California?
Jenny: There’s a huge waitlist [for childcare]… Even though I’m in healthcare now, I started my career in corporate childcare—I know very well the lack of high-quality childcare that’s out there. It’s almost non-existent, also there’s the affordability and availability issues. So as soon as I knew that I was pregnant, I started searching and found the one center in my area that I would consider using. I got on the waitlist, and I told them, “I know it’s so hard with two babies,” and they said, “No, it’s going to happen, you’re going to get in,” but I had an extensive maternity leave, so I had time [before I would require childcare]… And then, what happens is the other parents with children in the center have babies and they get to go to the top of the waitlist, because [childcare centers] want to keep the family in there—I totally get it. But there was a run of babies, so suddenly I had no childcare. I needed to get back to work so I hired a nanny. After three weeks, she quit because it was too hard, and she was still only part-time at that point. And right then COVID hit and everything shut down. And the center did eventually open again as protocols got put into place and at that point their baby rooms had openings. I don’t mean to be opportunistic with COVID, but literally the day my nanny said, “I can’t do this,” the center called and said, “We have two spots.” And obviously it was such a hard decision with COVID and group care and what that meant, but I was comfortable with their protocols and the kids went to the center. I think I knew of the au pair program but I had it in the back of my mind for when they were a little older.
Then, I found that they were sick all the time and although my parents helped quite a bit, there were a lot [of challenges]—the cost, some of the logistics factors, having them just gone all day at the center, and over time my parents had some things going on and were going to be less available to support with the illnesses. I think literally in the first 15 months the longest both boys had been in childcare because they were healthy was nine days… a nine-day run, that was the most I had.
Robin: We do hear from parents quite often that one of the challenges of center-based care is that the little ones get sick all the time. And the logistics—bringing them back and forth—and having them elsewhere instead of at home. It sounds like a lot of factors to consider.
Jenny: And losing some of the flexibility with my parents… so I started thinking about the au pair program again and decided to go forward at that point. It’s worked out really well. Where we’re at with the boys starting public school and getting that little bit of flexibility and support we need helped us decide to continue [with the program].
What is one word that describes your experience as a host family?
Jenny: “Amazing” comes to mind, but it just doesn’t get the heartfelt piece that I want… “Connection” is the word.
Robin: I’ll give you two: “amazing” and “connection.” Well, Jenny, thank you so much for your time, your support, and your story, we so appreciate you sharing. Thanks again for being such a great host mom.
Jenny: Great, thanks! Love it, appreciate it.
Are you a parent in California in need of reliable and affordable childcare? Au Pair in America can help you select an au pair who is the perfect fit for your family!
We understand the importance of consistent, high-quality childcare, and our team is here to provide comprehensive support, from matching you with the right au pair to providing year-round assistance and a personalized support team. Learn more about how Au Pair in America can make a difference for your family today. Want to see how our costs compare to other childcare options? View our au pair program fees here and see if you’re eligible for a discount.
