Category Archives: Au Pairs

Thanksgiving

Loren Kerns

At Thanksgiving, we pause and express gratitude to others.  This year I want to thank all my au pairs and host families for the love and support they give each other every day.  I also thank each au pair for sharing with me and my family about their culture, for demonstrating their bravery for coming from far away places and giving so much to their host families and their friends in America.  I appreciate the uniqueness of each of you. Your spirits, sense of humor, enthusiasm. It is an honor to be a part of your lives for this time and beyond. I love the relationships that have developed that last after an au pair returns home. I am thankful for the warm, caring host families in Southern Maryland who welcome some of the most wonderful young women into their homes and entrust the care of their children to them.  Host families who inspire, encourage, celebrate, cultivate and share their culture and customs. Host families that embrace each new au pair as a unique and special person. Host families that encourage an au pair to share her culture and customs and incorporate it to their family life. It is a beautiful thing to witness.

“The people-to-people ties and transfer of knowledge achieved through international education builds and sustains a more democratic, secure, and prosperous world that benefits the entire global community. International education and exchange is vital to our diplomacy efforts and establishes lasting ties between individuals today that translate into stronger relations between nations tomorrow.” -Assistant Secretary of State for Educational and Cultural Affairs, Evan Ryan

Some thoughts from au pairs current and departed about Thanksgiving:

“I didn’t know that thanksgiving was such a big holiday before I spent my year there. It was a really nice day. We started off with breakfast, cooking and baking in our pajamas and then we got ready and we were all dressed really chic and went off to my host mums part of the family in DC. There we had a lovely dinner with everything you can imagine! Everybody also had to say for what he or she is thankful, we were around forty people and it was so nice to hear about everybody.”

‘I was super curious on Thanksgiving and what it was like. It felt like something truly American and I had never tasted turkey or pumpkin pie before (which I had learnt you ate a lot of during Thanksgiving) since we went to Chicago and I got to meet a huge part of my hm’s family that was also something I really looked forward to! So the whole holiday was all food, food and some more food! And ALL kinds of pies! I believe there might have been around 7-8 different pies. I had a great thanksgiving!”

“Thanksgiving was actually one of my most favorite holidays in the states. We went to Ohio to spent it with family. Watching Macy’s parade while cooking the dinner and baking some pie. After eating the fantastic food watching some football and then of course some Black Friday shopping it was amazing!!”

“I really enjoyed Thanksgiving with my host family. It was as I imagined! So much food to try. Everyone got dressed up and shared what they were thankful for. It was so warm and special. The next day we began to prepare for Christmas. It was magical.”

“I am really excited to be with the whole family. To see everyone gathered around the table. I am so happy thinking about the foods, some I have never tried. I am curious about pumpkin pie. I want to cheer football too and maybe shop on Black Friday!”

“I am looking forward to experiencing the traditions. All the family coming, sharing good things and food….my host mom says there will be so much food!”

I wish each and every one of you a Happy Thanksgiving!

-Photo by Loren Kerns

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Making Pinch Pots

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Corn husk dolls and pinch pots

 

 

 

 

 

This year we celebrated our Host Family Day by attending the American Indian Heritage Day hosted by Jefferson Patterson Park in Calvert County. Many host families and au pairs braved the rain to enjoy the festivities! There were displays, artisans, dancers and plenty of things to make and touch! Highlights were corn husk dolls, pinch                                                    pots, grinding corn and fire making demonstrations!

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Learning how to make fire

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Learning how to shoot a bow and arrow

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Au Pair in America au pairs from all over the greater Washington DC/Baltimore region gathered recently to join in on a scavenger hunt at the National Zoo in Washington DC! The au pairs (and counselors) braved the cold to enjoy a morning hunting around the zoo. Afterwards, we gathered on a hill for a picnic! It was a great event!

Homesickness & Culture Shock

Almost everyone experiences culture shock when they come to a completely new environment. Everything is different: the language, the food, and the people.

Here are my Top 5 Tips for
Dealing with Homesickness

1. Make Friends – Don’t wait for other au pairs to reach out to you, reach out to them. There are other lots of new au pairs who are feeling the same way you are right now. Set a goal to reach out to someone each day. Some will respond and some will not. Don’t let that discourage you. No one will ever be mad at you for sending them a message to say hello or ask if they want to do something together. Make friends from various countries and you will also get a chance to practice your English skills together.

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2. Stay in touch with your home country, but not too much. Skyping or talking on the phone every day with your family and/or friends back home normally makes homesickness worse. Try emailing instead and reduce the Skype and phone calls to once a week, until you feel stronger. It’s much harder seeing the faces and hearing the voices of those you miss.

3. Get out of the house (or your room specifically) – Go to cluster meetings, have coffee or movies with other au pairs, join a gym, go to the library, go for a walk, visit the mall, get a manicure, visit a museum, go to get ice cream. If someone invites you out, say “yes.” Also, don’t be afraid to do the inviting. If your host family invites you to do things with them, say “yes.” This will help you get to know each other and contribute to your overall happiness.

4. Realize that it definitely gets better – All au pairs experience homesickness and nearly all of them stay and have a successful year (some stay for two years, some even come back for a second au pair experience after being back home for two years) So, it must get better, right? Once you get past the initial homesickness, most au pairs report how quickly the year goes by. Make sure you tell your host family, counselor and au pair friends that you are homesick – we’ll help you!

5. Make Plans – Create your own Au Pair Bucket List (places you want to go, new foods to try, new things to experience during your year in the U.S.) and start doing them now. Pinterest is a great option to plan your adventures! Post on our cluster Facebook group to find others who may want to join you on your adventures.

Taste of St. Mary’s

It was a magnificent afternoon today in historic Leonardtown as we gathered to enjoy the sights, sounds and eats at the Taste of St. Mary’s! As always, live music was playing, the antique cars were there for viewing, and of course, LOTS of great food to sample! Some of the great food we tried – Peach Bourbon Brisket Sliders; Crab, shrimp and mac n cheese balls; beef lumpia; strawberry banana smoothies; cannoli; cream of crab soup; jerk chicken; sea salt handmade caramels; and chocolate mousse!

Giant cookies from McKay’s were a big hit with Renata –

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Atessa tried the gazpacho fro Linda’s Cafe –

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Marise – got behind the wheel of this AWESOME Ford –

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We all enjoyed a visit with a deputy from the St. Mary’s County Sheriff’s Office –

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Au Pairs – Building Friendships & Cultural Exchange

Recently one of my au pairs shared with me some special thoughts about her year and the friendships she made with other au pairs in the cluster. She also shared about the impact of cultural exchange with au pairs from lots of different countries.  During her time in the US, Isabelle was friends with a very diverse group of young women from countries such as Germany, Austria, South Korea, France, Spain, South Africa, the UK, etc.

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“The friends you make become your family! I loved how fast you became friends since neither one of you know anybody in the beginning and were strangers to the area and even the country! You understand each others situations. We are all far away from family, friends and everything we know. I mean, not often would I go to a strangers house, pick this someone up in my car and go to a restaurant or similar without even thinking twice about who this person could be? All I know is that we are both au pairs and that kind of makes us good friends even before meeting up. What worked the absolute best for me when I got a bit of homesickness was to spend time together and come out and do stuff with friends! The best medicine!

I might add that I’ve also learned a lot about other countries through the new friends I’ve made. You don’t come to America and just learn about the American culture but also about other countries cultures! I haven’t been home for very long but I hope to be able to travel to a lot of countries one day and visit with my friends!”

-Isabelle, from Sweden

 

 

Making friends with au pairs in your cluster!

I queried several of my former au pairs on what the friendships they made here meant to them. This is from Mary Jane from Germany.

“For me, friends are a very important part in my life. They help you in bad times and celebrate the good times, so I knew before my year started it will be important to find some friends. I started looking for facebook groups from the area and already found other au pairs who are close to my host family’s place.

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When I got to the US I met up with the girls,even though they were a couple years older than me it was great that they can tell you about the area, as they see it as a foreigner. Also, other au pairs understand everyday stuff you have to deal while being an au pair pair even if you have completely different personalities, you always have something to share because you are in the same situation. That’s what brings you close, if you are open and honest for it. Its important to go out with them and explore and experience new things. Making those memories together make them even more unforgettable.


Au pairs come from all over the world, my best friends were from Sweden, New Zealand and Brazil. It was a crazy mix but you can share so much! We did cook outs where we cooked typical meals from our home country, we were trying to teach each other the language (at least some funny phrases). It really doesn’t matter where they or from, how old they are, what they studied/worked before – differences make it even more interesting. I met friends everyday: for play dates, going to the gym, movies, shopping and trips during the weekend. This is also a big advantage when your friends are also au pairs because they kinda have the same schedule and daily routine. They also understand if you just had a bad day and have to complain about everything.. The thing is, they know that you don’t always mean it when you say the kids were annoying or the host parents are bothering you, it’s completely normal that you have feelings like this even though you love your host kids and host parents.


If you want to make American friends I am sure the host parent can help you if you tell them you want them to help you.   My host parents were great friends for me and also helped me making connections with neighbors, people from their work (my age), their friends kids and whatever you can think of! Also, whenever you get out of the house you can meet people and make friends. Americans are very open and interested as soon as they notice you are from another country. So go to the park, gym, Applebee’s, Starbucks, pool, beach, mall…wherever…but GO OUT!  Even if you are shy, get out of your comfort zone, it will help you enjoying your time and having fun.


The extra bonus of making friends in the US is, you will have friends around the world who you can visit, travel, see where they really come from and get to know so many cultures!


I am back in Germany since one year now. My friend from South Africa came to visit me, I went to France to see two of my au pair friends, in a few days I am going to travel through Indonesia with an American friend and further plans are e.g. that me and two other au pairs will be the bridesmaids from an au pair friend who is back home in Brazil. Isn’t that amazing?

Sometimes it really hurts that your friends are so far away and you can’t see them very often but there is a thing called skype and who can say he/she has friends on almost every continent. Whenever I am sad about it, I just remind myself how lucky I am that I got the opportunity to meet them. Whenever I think about my time as an au pair there are so many amazing stories that come to my mind what I experienced with them!! The au pair program is an adventure and sharing it with friends made it simply perfect for me!! Having this experience together will make you remain friends forever.”

Thank you, Mary Jane!

Education Requirement – Explained

Au pairs are required to complete 6 credits or 8 CEUs or 72 or more hours.

EduCare Companions are required to complete 12 credits or 16 CEUs or 144 or more hours.

You may take credit or non-credit classes from an accredited college. Look under Resources toward the top of this page, then under “Education Options” for accredited schools in our cluster area. If you want to take a class at a school not listed here on my blog, please check with me first to make sure it is accredited. Otherwise, it would not count toward your education requirement.   education-icons

Your host family will pay an education allowance to assist you in completing your education requirement. They will also ensure your transportation to class (access to a car and gas expense will be covered). Au Pairs education allowance – $500, EduCare education allowance – $1000

There are ways to get your credits for just your education allowance, but it will not give you a lot of choices. Normally au pairs will contribute some of their own money ($200+) towards their education. I can help you plan out your year of classes to make it fun, interesting and educational!

The APIA Advantage UCLA Course is the only State Dept. approved class with an online component. No other online classes are accepted.

Note: Au pairs should only take one weekend course for their education requirement. Using only weekend courses to meet your education requirement could result in the denial of your extension application (should you decide to extend.)

Au Pair Firsts

Recently I asked my au pairs to share a favorite first. Some experience they had had in America that was meaningful, fun, surprising, etc. Here’s one to share from an au pair from Spain –

“New York City. Christmas time. Ice skating in Rockefeller Center with my boyfriend (visiting from Spain). They asked everybody to get out of the place while a couple was still skating. The girl was super nervous. #Marriedproposal First one I see out of movies. What better place to see it than NY in Christmas time, with my boyfriend! Lucky girl!! Lucky me!!!”

Jamie Pearson

Photo by Jamie Pearson