Author Archives: Christine Connally

Hints for Success – Homesickness/Culture Shock

Almost everyone experiences culture shock and homesickness when they come to a completely new environment. Everything is different: the language, the food, and the people.

Here are my Top 5 Tips for
Dealing with Homesickness

1. Make friends – Don’t wait for other au pairs to reach out to you, reach out to them. There are other new au pairs who are feeling the same way you are right now. Set a goal to reach out to a few of them each day. Some will respond and some will not. Don’t let that discourage you. No one will ever be mad at you for sending them a message to say hello or ask if they want to do something together. Make friends from various countries and you will also get a chance to practice your English skills together.

2. Stay in touch with your home country, but not too much. Skyping or talking on the phone every day with your family and/or friends back home normally makes homesickness worse. Try texting instead and reduce the Skype and phone calls to once a week, until you feel stronger. It’s much harder seeing the faces and hearing the voices of those you miss.

3. Get out of the house (or your room specifically) – Go to cluster meetings, have coffee, go to the park, and/or go places with other au pairs. If someone invites you out, say “yes” whenever possible. Also, don’t be afraid to do the inviting. If your host family invites you to do things with them, say “yes.” This will help you get to know each other and contribute to your overall happiness.

4. Share your culture with your host family – If you are missing some favorite foods from home, find ways that you can make them here and share them with your host family. There are many international markets in our area, you should be able to find most of the ingredients you need. If you are not really a cook, search online for restaurants and bakeries that have a taste of home. Your host family is probably just as excited to learn about your culture as you are to learn about America.

5. Make plans – Create your own Au Pair Bucket List (places you want to go, new foods to try, new things to experience during your year in the U.S.) and start doing them now. Post on our cluster WhatsApp group to find others who may want to join you on your adventures.

Realize that it definitely gets easier with time.

All au pairs experience homesickness to some extent and nearly all of them stay and have a successful year (some stay for two years.) So, it must get better, right? Once you get past the initial homesickness, most au pairs report how quickly the year goes by.

Photo by:  Shimelle Laine (Flickr)

What are the Rules for Holidays?

There are no regulations requiring host families to give au pairs any specific holidays off. In the spirit of the au pair program, many host families will give their au pair the day off on major holidays (Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s Eve, July 4th). Most au pairs look forward to sharing holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas with their host families to truly experience American family life.

There are other federal holidays (usually on Mondays), when many offices and sometimes schools are closed. These are regular workdays for an au pair, unless their host parents tell them otherwise.

There are also days when the children will be home from school. These can be on holidays, special work days for teachers or closures due to bad weather. Host parents and au pairs should review the calendar sent home from school and mark these on the family calendar and/or au pair work schedule. It’s a good idea for au pairs to plan some activities to occupy children who are at home. Keeping kids occupied and engaged can prevent boredom and sibling squabbles.

Au Pairs – Please check with your host parents before you assume you have any holiday off. Do not make any travel plans until you have received confirmation that you will not work on this day.

Host Parents – Please let your au pair know in advance when she will have a holiday off or a day when kids will be home from school, so she may plan accordingly. When there are school days off,  be sure to make adjustments to your au pair’s work schedule  to stay within the State Department regulations: not exceeding 10 hours per day or 45 hours per week (or 30 hours per week for Educare).

Photo: Dafne Cholet

Going Unplugged During Work Hours

Phones, tablets, and laptops are wonderful tools to stay connected and informed, but we need to be careful not to let them become distractions from real-life interactions and most importantly our responsibilities.

Au Pairs – Imagine for a moment that you went to the hospital and you were in the care of doctors and nurses. How would you feel if those doctors and nurses who were there to care for you were more interested in texting or using their personal computer than caring for you? How would that make you feel, about yourself and about them? Would you think that you were getting the treatment you deserved? Would you feel like paying the bill after your stay?

Life as an au pair, it is a fine balance between employee and family member. You live with your host family and participate with them as a member of the family, but you also have clear responsibilities as a childcare provider. Being a childcare provider is truly one of the most important jobs I can think of because you are helping to shape the next generation. What message are you sending them when you would rather interact with a computer than with them? How will they feel about themselves and about you? Children feel as though everything is about them. They will see this as a rejection of them and they will be more likely to act out.

It also poses a safety concern when you are not paying enough attention to the children in your care. Injuries and accidents happen, but when an adult caregiver is close by and appropriately supervising the chances of a major injury dramatically reduce.

During work hours, the following would not be considered acceptable:

  • Texting or talking to friends on the phone
  • Using Skype, FaceTime, or any other video chat
  • Using TikTok, Instagram, Snapchat, WhatsApp, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube,  or any other app or social media site
  • Playing online games
  • Anything else on your phone or computer (unless it is going a children’s website together with your host children)

There are some things you can do to make avoiding phone distractions easier:

  • Turn off notifications on apps that may distract you during the day.
  • Set specific notification sounds and ring tones for your host parents, so you can tell when it’s them trying to contact you.
  • Set boundaries with your friends and family back home and let them know when your typical work hours are and ask them to avoid contacting you during those times unless it’s an emergency.
  • Set up the driving mode feature on your phone.

Even if you work 45 hours a week, that leaves you 123 hours per week for all of that other stuff, or about 70 hours (if you are getting the recommended 7-8 hours of sleep per night.)

Phone Use in the Car – Using your phone to text or talk without Bluetooth while driving is illegal, a huge safety risk, and a bad example for the children (future drivers) in the car with you. One moment of distraction when you are driving can change someone’s life forever: your own and/or others around you.

Host Parents – You need to be clear about what you consider acceptable during work hours to avoid misunderstandings. Also, please understand that you are dealing with a generation of people who are very accustomed to being plugged in at all times. Their intention is not to be rude, they don’t necessarily realize how their actions will be perceived. Please use this information as an opportunity to begin a dialogue on the issue.

Image: Pexels.com

Back to School Planning

Back to school time is here. This can mean changes to the au pair schedule and possibly to the duties.  It is very important to communicate these changes to avoid problems.

Here is a list of topics to consider discussing:

  • Au pair’s work schedule.
  • The children’s school and activity schedules.
  • Where the children get dropped off and picked up and who will be doing this.
  • What to do if a child is staying home sick, late to school, does not get off the bus (if they are supposed to).
  • Driving laws regarding stopping for school buses.
  • How to tell if school has been canceled or delayed for bad weather.
  • Add the au pair to your list of people allowed to pick up the kids from school and explain the process.
  • What to pack for lunch.
  • The routine after school (do they have free time before starting homework, what to give for a snack, any chores, where do they put their backpacks & lunchboxes).
  • How to communicate about what’s going on at school. Your Kids in Care logbook from Au Pair in America can be a great two-way communication tool for keeping track of schedules, afterschool activities and day to day info that needs to be transferred between host parents and au pair.
  • If your au pair will be the one going through the children’s backpack and helping with homework, consider designating an area for putting things that need to be read and/or signed by parents.

Here are some Printable Fill-in-the-Blank School Notes for parents. You can print these out and have them ready for times when the kids are absent, late, have an early dismissal or you need to give permission for something.

Check out Au Pair in America’s Pinterest School Tips and Ideas pinboard for things like organization ideas, back to school traditions, printable lunch box notes, and fun lunch recipes.

Reminder: It is illegal in the State of Maryland for a child under the age of 8 to be left alone in the home or car. Please make sure that your drop off routine does not include leaving children under 8 at home or in the car while dropping off another child. Even if a host parent gives permission to do this, it is not allowed, because it is against the law.

Stopping for School Buses

With schools getting back in session soon and many new au pairs, I wanted to remind everyone about the Maryland law that requires you to stop for school buses. Below you will find pictures explaining what to do in 4 different types of roads if you approach a school bus at a stop. If you have questions, please ask me or your host parents.

The rules regarding stopping for school buses are:

  • It is against the law to pass a stopped school bus while its lights are flashing and its’ stop arm is extended.
  • On undivided roadways, with no physical barrier or median, vehicles must stop on both sides of the roadway.
  • Yellow flashing lights indicate that the bus is preparing to load or unload children. Motorists should slow down and prepare to stop their vehicles.
  • Red flashing lights and extended stop arms indicate that the bus has stopped, and children are getting on or off. Motorists approaching from either direction must wait until the red lights stop flashing before proceeding.

Police, who observe a motorist failing to stop and remain stopped for a school bus, can issue the violator a citation which carries a $570.00 fine and 3 points. There are also cameras on buses and the camera-generated fine is $250. Drivers failing to stop for pedestrians in a crosswalk can be issued a citation for $90-$500. These fines are subject to change and could increase. I am sharing them for your information.

Images: Maryland Center for School Safety & MD State Police

Local Fairs & Renaissance Festival

What is a Fair?

According to Wikipedia:
A fair (sometimes fayre) is a gathering of people to display or trade produce or other goods, to parade or display animals and often to enjoy associated carnival or funfair entertainment. Activities at fairs vary widely.

Fairs are also known by many different names around the world, such as agricultural show, carnival, fete or fête, county fair, exhibition or state fair, festival, market and show. Flea markets and auto shows are sometimes incorporated into a fair.

MD fair

Montgomery County Fair
August 8-16, 2025. Montgomery County Fairgrounds, 501 Perry Parkway, Gaithersburg, Maryland. (301) 926-3100. This is the fair’s 76th year! Carnival ride and games, animal exhibits, live entertainment, contests, fair food and more!

Maryland State Fair
August 21-September 7, 2025. Maryland State Fairgrounds, 2200 York Road Timonium, Maryland. (410) 252-0200. The Maryland State Fair was named one of the top 50 fairs in North America. This year’s 11-day festival will feature swifty swine racing pigs, live thoroughbred horse racing, bull riding and barrell racing, concerts, agricultural fair tours, games, rides and more.

Prince George’s County Fair
September 4 – 7, 2025. Prince George’s County Equestrian Center and the Showplace Arena, Water St., Upper Marlboro, Maryland. Prince George’s County Fair is the longest running in Maryland (since 1842!). Carnival rides, live animals displays, family circus, fireworks, live entertainment, food.

Anne Arundel County Fair
September 10-14, 2025. Anne Arundel County Fairgrounds, Generals Highway, Crownsville, Maryland. (410) 923-3400. Monster truck rides, carnival rides and games, farm animals and exhibits, pig races, antique saw mill, pie eating contest, talent show and much more.

Renn Fest

Au Pairs enjoying the Renn Fest’s iconic turkey legs.

Maryland Renaissance Festival  (Also known as Renn Fest)
August 23-October 19, 2025.
1821 Crownsville Rd, Annapolis, MD 21401. Set in a fictional 16th-century English village named Revel Grove, the festival is spread over 25 acres (100,000 m2). The second largest renaissance fair in the United States. Features costumed staff,  food, performances, glass-blowing demonstrations, jousting, crafts and much more.

Tickets must be purchased online before you go and they often sell out, so plan ahead. Bring cash to pay for food, drinks and attractions because some only accept cash. They have ATMs there, but the fees are very high.

Tip: If you go on a rainy day, wear shoes you don’t mind getting muddy. The Festival grounds are not paved. 

Camp Au Pair – Outer Space

Next week’s Camp Au Pair theme is Outer Space.

Crafts, recipes, activities, and games related to outer space can all be found here on the Camp Au Pair – Outer Space pinboard.

Here is a fun one that combines a science lesson, art, and snack time.

Field Trips can be a great way for kids to learn and have new experiences. Get permission from your host parents before any outings and be sure to check hours and admission information on the websites before you go. Here are a few places to go, that fit this theme:

  • Air & Space Museum
  • Planetarium
  • Science Center

Webcams – You can do a Google search for websites with webcams that allow you to observe space. Here is one from the International Space Station to get you started.

Online Games – NASA has a gallery of free space games for kids.

Videos – Look for fun videos on YouTube about outer space. Here are a few to get you started.

The Magic School Bus is a television series that follows Ms. Frizzle and her class as they set off on field trips. Most episodes can be found on YouTube. Here are some episodes that fit this week’s theme.

Movies – Here are some movies that fit the space theme.

  • WALL-E
  • Zathura
  • Monsters vs. Aliens
  • Star Wars  

Here are some movies that are PG-13 and may be appropriate for older kids.

  • Hidden Figures
  • The Martian

Books – Stop by your local library and look for books on outer space. You can also find books being read aloud on Youtube.  Me & My Place in Space, There Was an Old Astronaut Who Swallowed the Moon, and Mae Among the Stars are a few fun ones to get you started.

Story Time from Space is a YouTube channel with real astronauts reading children’s books aloud.

Photo: alittlepinchofperfect.com

Camp Au Pair – Art Experiences

This week’s Camp Au Pair theme is Art Experiences.

Crafts, recipes, activities, and games related to art can all be found here on the Camp Au Pair – Art Experiences pinboard.

Culture Sharing – Share any specific forms of art that are popular in your home country (mosaics, origami, murals, fabric dying, etc.) Are there any famous artists from your country that you could share their works with your host kids?

Field Trips can be a great way for kids to learn and have new experiences. Get permission from your host parents before any outings. Check the websites before you go to be sure you understand the hours, costs, and whether advance tickets/reservations are required.

Online Art Fun – Here is a great website with lots of art activities including ones for older kids.

Webcams – You can do a google search for art websites with webcams. Here are a few to get you started:

Videos – Look for fun videos on YouTube about drawing and all kinds of art.

Books – Stop by your local library and look for books on famous artists and art.

Check YouTube for books on art being read aloud:

Image: teachkidsart.com

Camp Au Pair – Bugs & Butterflies

Next week’s Camp Au Pair theme will be Bugs & Butterflies.

More than 100 crafts, recipes, and activities related to all kinds of bugs, insects, butterflies, and spiders can be found here on the Camp Au Pair – Bugs & Butterflies  pinboard.

Field Trips can be an excellent way for kids to learn and have new experiences. Get permission from your host parents before any outings. Check the websites before you go to be sure you understand the hours, costs, and whether advance tickets/reservations are required.

  • Butterfly exhibits
  • Flower Gardens
  • Natural History Museums
  • Parks with Nature Areas
  • Zoo

Games – There are more bug and butterfly-themed games than you might expect. 

Outdoors – Kids today do not spend enough time outdoors. Take the kids in the backyard or another nature area (approved by your host parents) and do some activities related to this theme:

  • Allow them to search for bugs and butterflies.
  • Observe lightning bugs (also known as fireflies) in the evening. Here is a map showing what people call these little guys in different parts of the country.
  • After it rains, look for earthworms. Not bugs or butterflies, but very interesting creatures you can find in your own backyard.

NOTE: If you are outdoors with the children, be sure to check for ticks when you come back inside. Here is a blog post explaining the health risk ticks can pose and how to find and remove them safely.

Webcams – You can do a Google search for websites with webcams that allow you to observe bugs. Here are some to get you started.

Books – Make a trip to the library and/or check your kids’ bookshelf for books on bugs and butterflies. You may find some classics like The Very Hungry Caterpillar or The Grouchy Ladybug by Eric Carle. You can also find books being read aloud on YouTube videos like this one.

Movies – There are lots of movies with insect themes.

  • The Ant Bully
  • Antz
  • A Bugs Life
  • The Bee Movie
  • Charlotte’s Web
  • James & the Giant Peach
  • Maya the Bee 
  • Miniscule: Valley of the Lost Ants
  • Wings of Life (documentary)

Videos – You can find many great videos of butterflies and insects on YouTube. Check out these videos for kids about bees and ants. All about Insects covers lots of tiny creatures who crawl and fly. Here are a few videos to get you started.

Image: minieco.co.uk

Camp Au Pair – Cars & Trucks

Next week’s Camp Au Pair theme will be Cars & Trucks.

Crafts, recipes, activities, and games related to all kinds of vehicles can all be found here on the Camp Au Pair – Cars & Trucks pinboard.

Field Trips can be an excellent way for kids to learn and have new experiences. Get permission from your host parents before any outings. Here are a few field trips that go with this theme:

  • Go kart track (even if they aren’t old enough to drive, watching the cars is fun.)
  • Look for construction areas where the kids can observe big machines in action. Kids should observe from the car or a safe area.
  • Keep an eye out for the trash truck and let them watch the truck in action.
  • Go to a drive-through car wash and/or let the kids make their own car wash at home.

Virtual Field Trips

  • Watch vehicles being assembled with virtual auto plant tours from Toyota & BMW.

Videos – Mighty Machines & Amazing Big Trucks are kid-friendly video channels showing machinery and big trucks in action. Look for fun videos on YouTube about cars and trucks.

Movies – Here are some movies that fit the cars and trucks theme.

  • Bumble Bee
  • Bob the Builder Mega Machines
  • Cars, Cars 2 & 3
  • Chitty Chitty Bang Bang
  • Go Karts
  • Speed Racer
  • The Love Bug
  • Turbo 

Books – Check your kids’ bookshelf for books on cars & trucks. You can also find many read aloud book videos on YouTube. Cool Cars , Little Blue Truck, The Garbage Trucks Are Coming Today, and With Any Luck, I’ll Drive a Truck  are a few fun ones to get you started.

Image: funlearningforkids.com